Love is a Curse
by Undead Priestess Shashaiti
Summary: Rick loves Imhotep loves Anck-su-namun loves Evelyn loves Ardeth loves Jonathan loves Ardeth, and Alex is disturbed.
1. Morning Glory

**Love is a Curse by Undead Priestess Shashaiti**

[Author's note: 3rd story… while I'm still typing the 2nd story… I hope I can keep up with both of them properly…

Well, let me tell you how this story came about… I am a huge mummy fan, but that's obvious. I recently saw The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and somehow they just swirled in my mind, and I got this demented little idea…I hope that this one goes down in history as the greatest, most notorious slash/yaoi mummy movie fic with extreme bouts of both comedy and drama ever… I really do hope so…

This is sort of a crossover, but not really. It's all mummy characters, none from the rocky horror picture show, but I use some songs/song tunes from the rocky horror picture show, and some of the humor is rocky horror-ish, and most of the relationships that are trying to bloom here are homosexual… it's hilarious, please read it before you judge it…

I love reviews, just saying, thanks!

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE MUMMY, THE MUMMY RETURNS, OR ANY OF IT'S CHARACTERS, AND I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE SONGS FROM THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW, AND I DO NOT OWN ANY OTHER COPYRIGHTED FILM WORK MENTIONED IN THIS STORY. THIS IS JUST A SIMPLE NON-PRPOHIT PIECE OF FANFICTION, MADE TO AMUSE PEOPLE. I AM NOT TRYING TO VIOLATE YOUR COPYRIGHT, AND I DO NOT OWN YOUR WORK. YOUR COPYRIGHT IS GOOD. THANK YOU.

I'd tell you to prepare for this, but there's just no way to properly get ready for this… :D ]

**Chapter 1 ~ Morning Glory**

Rick was back in Hamunaptra, fighting for his life, fighting for Jonathan-whom just can't fight for himself, fighting for humanity, fighting for… the girl he loved. He was glad that she had finally gotten off of that damn table and out of those damn chains, and now was trying to read the book of the living.

He looked to Imhotep, his mortal- erm, immortal enemy. His glare seared through him and sweat trailed down his forehead, neck, and… muscular, bare chest- UHH! Forget about that! The soldier mummies were going crazy on his ass! The yelling was just too much for Rick to take in! What the hell was going on?!?

Suddenly, he noticed- the soldier mummies were pulling his girl and her brother back! Back into some room, into the halls! Suddenly, a wall fell down, separating them from him.

All was silent. Now, it was just him and Imhotep… man to man- erm, mummy…

His enemy across the room walked with a strange grace down the stairs. His glare stayed on Rick, unblinking. He approached him, walking forward to the gunslinger until they were only a foot apart.

Imhotep looked left. Then right. Then straight at Rick.

His glare faded, and became a sly, devilish…sexy smirk.

Imhotep came close to Rick- right against him, really- and… unbuttoned the top button of his shirt!

"Thank the gods, we're finally alone…" he said.

"UHH…What are you doing?" Rick asked.

Imhotep looked up, raising one eyebrow, adding to his smirk. "What do you think I'm doing?"

Rick could not muster up a response to that, it was just too… too damn hot… NO! He wouldn't admit to that!

The second button was open.

"…S-Stop that…."

"Rick, your lower half disagrees."

DAMN IT, WHY CAN'T I EVER HOLD BACK AN ERECTION?!? Rick wondered.

Imhotep suddenly ripped Rick's shirt off, impatience overcoming him. Rick gasped, a mixture of shock and stimulation becoming apparent. Imhotep proceeded to push Rick down onto the table where Evelyn was about to be sacrificed earlier, going at his belt.

Rick sat up. "Wait, wait! I-I never said that I would do this! I never agreed to-"

Imhotep ripped off Rick's pants and underwear in one quick swipe. With another flick of his arm, his black robes were off, revealing his dazzling bear chest.

"Imhotep, I- I-I- I've never been with a man before!!!"

He looked into Rick's eyes, amused. "Neither have I."

"Oh, GOD… Take off that skirt!" Rick requested, excited and impatient.

"Heh…. Rick, it's not a skirt, it's a loincloth. But… I refuse. Keep a bit of mystery for you until we… well, I'll let you guess. First… I'm sure you remember what I did earlier in the sandstorm?"

"Oh, yeah." Rick responded, straining, managing to grumble his statement.

"Well… let me show you what else I can do with my mouth!" Imhotep responded, just before sliding down, lowering over Rick's throbbing erection. He glanced up at Rick, smirking and letting out a quiet laugh at the sight of Rick's look that was practically begging him to continue…

"AHHH!" Rick cried out in pleasure. He was admittedly slightly in awe of how Imhotep was working wonders on him, his heated breath on his manhood, lips pressed around it, tongue caressing the underside of it, making him moan and cry out, unable to keep any composure. The heat was too good, the feel was too much ecstasy, and the man was too… too damn beautiful!

"Ohhh, agh, ah! Imhotep, I- I'm going to cum! Oh my god- yes, yeah, ahh- AAHHH!!!"

Rick yelled out as he ejaculated, all of his semen being swallowed by the tanned Egyptian man sucking on his hard member.

Imhotep arose, a sultry expression on his face. "Rick…" He got on his hands and knees above the sweating nude man below him. "…take off my loincloth, I order you."

Rick complied with the request, slowly pulling off the tiny garment, revealing his hardness, making him also utterly naked.

Imhotep pulled Rick closer to him, their erections rubbing together as Imhotep left a love mark on Rick's neck. He proceeded to look into the adventurer's eyes, and kiss him, their lips meeting in the sweetest harmony.

Imhotep smiled, sitting up, grabbing Rick's legs and wrapping them around his erection. "Uhm… couldn't that hurt you by accident, if I slipped or something?" Rick asked. Imhotep smirked. "Actually, I think I can get it at this angle."

The look on Rick's face made his excitement apparent once more. Imhotep ran his hand down Rick's back, lifting him slightly. He began to enter Rick through the rear, his penis penetrating through the small opening of Rick's---

RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rick groaned at the sound of his alarm clock's bells chiming. He turned slightly in the bed, picking it up off of his nightstand, clicking the button and turning it off. He sighed as he turned to his wife, Evelyn.

"Good morning, Rick." She said grumpily. She glanced downward. "Ah, there it is again, it's always rise and shine with your morning glory!" She took her pillow from under her head and shoved it onto his morning hard-on.

He hated it when she did that!

It had been 5 months since they returned home from the golden pyramid at Ahm Shere. Surprisingly, somehow… all of the love just seemed to have left their marriage. Rick and Evelyn's relationship had deteriorated- they didn't kiss, make love, or even say "I love you" anymore, but they argued all the time. They were obviously approaching a divorce.

But… secretly, Rick was becoming increasingly attracted to… Imhotep. Ever since he saw him fall down to …hell?... he felt as though he were falling for him! When he saw that look on his face, that look of loneliness before he killed himself, he felt as though…well, as though there had been some sort of connection, as though he needed to save him… as though he needed to love him…

They got up out of bed, Evelyn in her white nightgown, Rick in his underwear.

"Rick, what is it that you're dreaming about that gets you so excited overnight? You moan and yell in your sleep, and you always wake up with an erection… I know that's supposedly normal, but I can tell, you're having an erotic dream about someone… and it's not me, is it?"

He groaned. "No, Evelyn, it's not you. I don't want to talk about it!"

"Well, why not? It's not like we have anything anymore!"  
"You've noticed?"

"Of course! We never have sex, we never talk, we can't look each other in the eye, hell, you can't even admit to me that you're having dreams of a sexual nature with our worst enemy!--- ops… oh, shit…"

"Wha- who- how… How did you know about that?!?"

"You talk in your sleep, and quite clearly."

"……..WELL, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, DON'T LISTEN IN!!!!"

"Oh, good lord, you're always so jumpy about it! You just can't take it when anything goes outside of your way! This would all be so much easier, if only you were Ardeth-"

"ARDETH?!? Evelyn, Ardeth's been dating your brother for ten years, ever since they met personally in that library you used to work at, AND YOU KNOW THAT! I mean, ferchrissake, THEY HAVE THEIR OWN ROOM TOGETHER IN THIS HOUSE!"

"Yes, well, things change! Maybe one day he'll fancy me!"

"Evelyn, HE'S GAY!!!"

"Well, maybe he's just bi! No one's ever taken the time to ask, now have they?"

"Evelyn, god, move on! He's just not into you, or any other woman!"

"You might not be either."

"EVELYN, GET OFF OF THE SUBJECT!"

"No, I don't believe we should! We're both after something other than what we have! I do really have a thing for Ardeth, so there! But what about you and Imhotep? How do I know that you don't want him when you're awake, that you don't love him more than you love me, huh?"

"EVELYN, I DO LOVE HIM MORE THAN I LOVE YOU! INFACT, I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY THAT I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE!!!-- ….oh, shit…."

"…."

"….."

"…Well, Rick, I think it's time that we chat about getting a divorce."

"Oh, what will you do then, seduce Ardeth?"

"Why, yes, maybe I will!"

"FINE!"

"FINE!"

"FINE!"

They turned, walked to opposite sides of the room, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, music started to play. And so… they began to sing to the tune of the song, which happened to be "Damn it, Janet"…

Strangely, somewhere in the clouds, their divine author, Undead Priestess Shashaiti echoed every time Rick said E-V…

"I walked the road, than I ran it, E-V! I wanted us to be, or I used to, E-V! I married you; I regret it, E-V! And now I just want you to CAN IT, E-V! I HATE YOU! I can't take all you bitching, damn it, E-V! The future ain't ours; let's re-plan it, E-V! My heart ain't yours no more, am it, E-V? I have one thing to say and that's DAMN IT, E-V, I HATE YOU! There's something to prove that we have lost it, I wonder where our love did go, but that's nothing for me to look for- Oh, you Evelyn, I hate you so! "

"I hate you too, and I'm so mad, too bad! I don't want us to be and you know that, know that! I've one thing to say, you are a cad, A CAD! I think you know this, but Rick, you dick, I'm not into you!"

Evelyn picked up the lamp next to her, and wielded it like a sword.

"OH, RICK!"

Rick was concerned suddenly. "Oh…Evelyn…."

"I'M MAD!!!"

"OH!!!... EVELYN!!!"

"You bet if I get any closer that you're screwed,"

They joined together for one verse-

"There's just one thing left to do- FIGHT YOU!"

He grabbed her lamp and threw it across the room. It shattered, and therefore their fight remained verbal…

Come on, just because it's a comedic fighting scene doesn't mean I'll allow spousal abuse, Shashaiti declared to the pair! And I don't even need quotation marks, because I'M WRITING WHATEVER YOU DO DOWN! HA!!! I'm so evil…

They yelled on a bit longer, to finally join in together once more for the final verse of the song-

"Damn it! I…..hate……yoooooooooou."

The music ended, and so did their chatting.

"So it's agreed! We're divorced!"  
"I would say so, Rick!"

"FINE! I'm leaving! But I'll be back, mark my words- this is still OUR house!" And then suddenly, Rick stormed out of the room, leaving Evelyn to sit around and be grumpy in the comfort of her own room.

FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER….

Rick took off out of their driveway in the small, one-person airplane that they owned. His son Alex, and his friends Ardeth and Jonathan looked on in question.

"Dad, what the bloody hell are you DOING?!?" Alex yelled up to the sky to Rick.

"Son, sometimes, you just have to go after what your heart wants! Take it from me! I'LL BE BACK IN A MONTH OR SO!!!"

The three looked on as Rick flew off.

He went above the clouds, and, sitting on one was…Shashaiti, typing down his glorious flight onto a laptop the same color as the sky for the sake of camouflage. He looked at her and raised one eyebrow. In response, she proceeded to shrug her shoulders, and continue typing.

The three- or can I perhaps say two and a half- men back on the ground looked on as Rick disappeared from their view.

Jonathan smirked. "Ah, going after the man he truly loves… that's just romantic."

"Yes… it gives one ideas, doesn't it?" Ardeth responded.

Jonathan looked at him coyly. "…Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I do believe so." Ardeth said with a seductive tone.

"Well then, let's get to it, you naughty boy!" Jonathan said before leaping into Ardeth's arms, laughing.

As Ardeth proceeded to carry Jonathan back into the house, and predictably into their room and onto the bed, Alex looked on into the sky, at the rising sun, at the spot where his father had disappeared from view. He shook his head, and proceeded to use the foul language he learned from his peers at school, saying a statement to which Shashaiti retorted ! His statement was as follows:

"I swear, everyone in this house is going fucking insane…. Yeah, I think so, bloody fucking insane…."


	2. A Quiet Family Meal

**Chapter 2: A Quiet Family Meal**

ONE MONTH LATER….

The airplane was almost ready to go back home. Rick kept on checking his equipment, gauges, tires, and… basically everything else on the plane, along with tying some ropes to the wings…

Standing a few yards away were Imhotep and Anck-su-namun.

Indeed, it had taken quite a while to fly from his home (unintentionally only wearing his underwear), find Ahm-shere, find a digging crew, uncover the golden pyramid of Ahm-shere, resurrect Imhotep, sacrifice the digging crew to Imhotep so he could regenerate (it went against Rick's morals, but, he had to do it to make his love appear human, didn't he?!?), discover that Anck-su-namun (in her reincarnated form of Meela)had been resurrected also somehow by Imhotep's spell, and deciding to bring them both back to his home, but Rick decided that it was worth it. He was busy preparing the ropes to tie them to the wings for getting to home, while they were talking.

Imhotep was, as one can imagine, confused. His worst enemy had resurrected him, and seemed to be aiding him, for a reason he did not know, and his beloved Anck-su-namun had resurrected when he did, and she appeared unscathed. How could any of this be? Perhaps it was the will of Shashaiti, he thought to himself.

"Anck…… can we get back together?" he asked her.

"No, Imhotep….. We really can't. I'm sorry, I just….I can't."

"….Why?"  
"………Imhotep, I've lied to you. This whole time…. My love for you was a sham…… it was a cover-up…."

"….A cover-up?"

"Yeah….. Imhotep, umm….. the thing is…….. I like…… women."

"…What do you mean?" He knew what it meant, he just didn't want it to be true.

But, it was…. "I'm…. a lesbian."

"…Why? …. Why did you ever have a relationship with me, then, if it was a cover-up?"

"Umm…. I didn't think that the pharaoh would take me loving his daughter very well…"

"Nefertiri?!? You love…..Evelyn?!?"

"…Yes. And I know that it all ended up going too far, our relationship and all, and I tried to make it seem like I didn't love her to the point that I killed her… I'm really sorry, Imhotep, I'm so sorry…"

Imhotep could feel himself turn pale. He could feel all of his motivation to take over the world for her, or try at living, or even move just escape his grasp. This…. This made life worthless.

They had no knowledge that Rick overheard them, and that he had learned Ancient Egyptian in the past few months. He stayed silent, listening closely, feeling so bad for Imhotep, and yet smugly amused at the annoyance approaching Evelyn…

"So," Rick jumped in, pretending that he heard nothing, "Are you ready to come to my home? It's pretty nice, and…. Well, I don't know where you're going to go otherwise."

"………………..Alright." Imhotep said after much hesitation. His life was now nothing to him, he had no plan or purpose, and he had nothing to do. Why not follow this man to see if he had some plan? Even if he was his enemy, he had more of an idea of what to do with his life than he himself did… he didn't really even care what happened, at this point….

Rick felt ridiculous tying them to the wings- especially considering Imhotep had the unhuman power to get away if he tried. But, indeed, it did feel like old times…

Imhotep suddenly wondered why the hell he agreed to this.

However, Anck-su-namun was eager to finally be on her way to admit her love for Evelyn…

MEANWHILE……

Evelyn leaned over the table as she poured Ardeth more wine for dinner, her boobs nearly falling out of her white v-neck dress, nipples mere centimeters away from being revealed.

"Erm… thank you, Evelyn."

"It's nothing for you…. Ardeth."

Ardeth sighed. He looked at Jonathan, his boyfriend sitting next to him, and cringed. This woman was trying to tempt a man in love with her brother… for pete's sake…

"So, Ardeth, you aren't worried? About Rick, I mean." She asked him.

"No, not at all. He may be resurrecting the creature, but-"

"OH MY GOD! HE'S BRINGING THE MUMMY BACK FROM THE DEAD? …AGAIN?!?" Jonathan interrupted.

"…Yes, Jonny." Ardeth responded.

"…Nobody tells me anything in this house… Why didn't you stop him?!?"

"Because, he is a part of a prophecy."

"What? How do you know?"

"Well, he's the prophesized one who… erm… He's supposed to be the creature's lover, and his affection will keep Imhotep from wanting vengeance on the human race. I know because…. You remember my riddle, the one where I asked him if I were a traveler from the east and he instinctively answered he's a traveler from the west, without being taught? Well… there are riddles, and if you just spit out the answer without trying, then… you'll fulfill a prophecy."

"What was the riddle?" Jonathan asked.

"It was, 'If I were to tell you that you will defeat the mummy's curse with an even greater curse, you would say…?' and he responded, 'I will end the mummy's curse with love, the greatest curse of all', just before he got into the airplane."

"Mum, FERCHRISSAKE, PLEASE PULL UP THE TOP OF YOUR DRESS, I AM YOUR SON, AND SEEING THAT IS TRAUMATIZING FOR ME!" Alex yelled suddenly, nearly chocking on his chicken.

"ALEX, we were talking! It's rude to interrupt!" she responded.

Suddenly, they heared a sound like an airplane coming to a stop in their front yard…. And they knew it was Rick…. And, also, a previously un-nameable immortal man…

IN THE YARD…

"Geez, it always has to rain when I'm landing this plane in England, doesn't it?!?" Rick complained as the three got out of the plane. Unlike Rick, Imhotep was rather enjoying the rain… it was a rare occurance in Egypt, and he always found it to be one of life's little pleasures… Anck-su-namun was worried about her previously perfectly done hair, on the other hand.

"Erm… I've gotta put this plane up, in the garage… you two can go in the house, I'll be in soon." "…Thanks…" Anck-su-namun said (in English, which she understood thanks to being reincarnated as Meela), before walking off toward the door with Imhotep.

Strangely enough, a newspaper blew in the wind and hit Anck-su-namun in the face. She peeled it off and held it over her head as a shield for her hair (much like Janet Weiss…). Suddenly, somewhere, the music started up, and she started to sing…

"Out of the realm of darkness, and the blackest night, there was a light, now we live again… And look where we are… look where we are!"

Imhotep joined in, and both of them sang, "There's a light!"

"Over at the O'Connel place!" Shashaiti echoed somewhere in the distance, to get the response:

"There's a light!"

"Burning in their fireplace!"

"There's a light…light…in the darkness…of every…rainy night." They finished. Anck-su-namun threw the newspaper back into the wind, and they entered the house.

All the people at the dinner table looked over at them. For a moment, they all stared at each other during an awkward silence. Ardeth finally broke it, saying, "Well… you may as well join us for dinner, I guess…" "GYOHD, this is crazy…" Alex muttered.

Rick stumbled into the house then, looking around during an awkward silence like before. "Rick…I see you're back." Evelyn said. Rick responed, "Like I said, Evelyn… It's still OUR house."

"Please, can we just all eat dinner to end this awkward silence before it kills us?" Jonathan said.

And so, they did… but the awkward silence still loomed over them as they ate at the dinner table.

"So…" Ardeth tried to start, "…how was Egypt?"

"Hot and dry." Rick responded.

Silence…

"Imhotep… what are you doing?" Anck-su-namun asked him.

"Thinking." He responded in a word. His feet were propped up on the table, on top of his empty dinner plate, his eyes were closed, and his arms were crossed on his chest. He was a mummy- he didn't need food, just time for thought. Someone else might have said something about the impoliteness of his position at the table, but they were slightly intimidated by him…

Alex rolled his eyes, and said "So, dad, when are you going to marry the fucking mummy, ferchrissake?"

"WHAT?!?!?" Anck-su-namun yelped, after accidentally spewing wine across the table at Jonathan.

Jonathan glared at her. He then said, "Rick loves Imhotep. …Thank God he doesn't know English…."

"Imhotep, my ex-husband Rick has fallen in love with you." Evelyn told him in Ancient Egyptian.

"YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!" Rick accidentally blurted out, splashing his wine onto her from across the table.

Suddenly, Imhotep's eyes flew open. He stayed completely still, unmoving, like a statue; even his eyes stayed fixed staring at the ceiling widely in absolute shock.

As he did so, Evelyn retaliated at Rick by flinging her spoon at him. However, her aim was off and it ended up smacking Jonathan's cheek.

"Well, if that's how it's going to be, sis—" Jonathan said before throwing a few leaves of lettuce at her.

Alex stood on the table, grabbed a fistful of mashed potatoes, flung it upon Ardeth's face, and yelled "FOOD FIGHT!!!"

And so, it erupted. Ardeth laughed, and poured the remainder of his bowl of soup on Jonathan, whom was in the process of throwing an asparagus at him but missed and it smacked the face of Rick, whom threw his dull hard stake bone at Evelyn, whom covered her eyes protectively as her piece of watermelon inadvertently went down the front of Anck-su-namun's dress.

As the fight went on, gaining noise and chaos, Imhotep still kept on staring at the ceiling in overwhelming shock, not seeming to notice the edible debris flying around the room, occasionally landing on him.

Somewhere, the electric guitar music started up, and Jonathan began to sing…

"It's astounding… Time is… fleeting… Madness… takes its toll…. But listen closely… not for very much longer!... I've got to… keep control… I REMEMBER… DOING THE TIME WARP… DRINKING… THOSE MOMENTS WHEN… THE BLACKNESS WOULD HIT ME, AND THE VOID WOULD BE CALLING---"

Rick interrupted, yelling, "NO! NO, NOT AGAIN JONATHAN! NO, I SWEAR, NO! JONATHAN, WE ARE NOT DOING THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!!"

He looked around. "Everyone, I think we should just go get a bath and go to bed… this has clearly gone awry! …AGH!!! So much for giving a nice introduction to our guests, a.k.a new residents!"

"You're just pissed off 'cuz Imhotep knows your feelings for him." Evelyn said.

"SHUT UP!!! ….Erm….. AGH!!! JUST GO!!! Goodnight!" He said frustraightedly as the people cleared the table. Alex made a beeline to his room, slamming the door shut, because he knew what was coming up next—

"Okay… I know we only have one guest room, and one room belongs to Alex and it seems he won't give it up to company, another room belongs to Jonathan and I, and another formerly to Rick and Evelyn, so…..who's sleeping where?" Ardeth asked. "Because wherever the rest of you go, I'm staying with my Jonny. Which reminds me Jon…. Some of the mashed potatoes went down my shirt and onto my chest…. I was thinking maybe you could lick it off me…" Jonathan began to clap his hands and squeal like a schoolgirl. He grabbed Ardeth's hand, and they ran upstairs and into their room, closing the door and going to the task given eagerly…

The remaining four, being Rick, Evelyn, Anck-su-namun, and Imhotep (whom was still stairing at the ceiling in shock), were left to decide.

"Well, one thing's for sure, I am NOT sleeping in the same bed as you!" Evelyn said, pointing at Rick. "Well you are not going to sleep with him!" Rick said to Evelyn, pointing at Imhotep.

"So it's decided! I will sleep in what was our room with Anck-su-namun, and YOU can take the guest room with your precious mummy lover!" Evelyn declaired, as Anck-su-namun threw a fist in the air and whisper-yelled "YES!" to herself and then regained a normal stance before Evelyn noticed.

"Yes, that's great!" Rick said cheerfully.

"NO!" Imhotep yelled, jumping out of his stillness at the table and onto his feet, walking to the other three gathered near the staircase. "NO! I WILL NEVER HAVE THIS! I WILL NOT DO THIS! I WILL NOT WAKE UP TO FIND MY ENEMY PANTING OVER MY DICK IF I SO CHOOSE TO SLEEP, I WILL NOT HAVE HIM TRY TO SEE ME NAKED, AND I WILL NOT HAVE HIM TRY TO FUCK ME!!! IT SIMPLY WILL NOT HAPPEN!!!"

"Well, Imhotep, would you rather sleep in the same bed as one of them- a woman you tried to kill, which could be awkward, or your ex, which could be even more awkward—more so awkward than being with a man who has a thing for you?" Rick asked.

"Actually-" Imhotep began, but stopped when he looked at the two women, arm in arm, Anck-su-namun mouthing the word "please" to him. This stopped him. He still had feelings for the woman, and though she no longer loved him, or supposedly never did, he still wanted to see her happy….

"FUCK!" He yelled, slamming his fist into the wood railing for the stairs, leaving a slight indention. He reached a hand out to Rick. "…Okay. I'll sleep in your bed… BUT NO FUNNY BUSINESS!" he agreed. "…Alright, then." Rick said, shaking the hand Imhotep gave.

…And so, they went up the stairs, and into their rooms…

AN HOUR OR SO LATER…

Evelyn stepped out of the adjacent bathroom, entering the bedroom, wiping her just-bathed body with a bath towel…

Anck-su-namun, whom had already bathed, was waiting for Evelyn… she laid on her side on the bed naked, showing of her tanned body; her thin waist; her perky, round, B-cup breasts with light pink nipples; her vagina, with pubic hair in the style of the aptly named "landing strip"; her sly smirk…

"…Anck-su-namun…. What are you doing?" Evelyn asked suspiciously. "Desiring……" she stood and walked to Evelyn, who flinched back when she reached for her cheek. "Desiring you."

"Anck—"she objected just before going speechless against her own will when Anck-su-namun snatched the towel from her, revealing her body. "Ahh…you're not shaven. I've never been with an unshaven person before… I like it, it's kinda sexy…" she told her.

Evelyn ran to the door, but Anck-su-namun caught her from behind, her breasts squeezed against her back, one hand around her waist, the other on her left breast, which was slightly larger than her own…

"E-V, I have to admit, I am pretty eager…. I just love you so much; I have for so long… I'm sorry I killed you- pretending to hate you for so long went too far…. Just come on, be with me now…"

"No….no, help me…..Ardeth…."

"You took a liking to your brother's boyfriend?"

"…Yes…. Oh God, please…. Let me go…. I'm not a lesbian…"

Anck-su-namun pinched Evelyn's nipple. Evelyn gasped a bit. She hated to admit it, but she did like the feeling it gave her…

"LET…ME…GO!!!" She said, suddenly gaining strength.

Anck-su-namun sighed, letting Evelyn go. She loved her and wanted her, but… she wasn't for screwing with her against her will. Rape just wasn't her thing.

"Why do you like a gay guy? It's kind of hopeless."

"Why do you like a straight woman?"

Anck-su-namun flinched back. It hurt to hear it…. But she just couldn't give up now….

Evelyn glared at Anck-su-namun. She reached into her drawer, pulled out a sky blue nightgown, and slipped it on. She then got under the covers on her bed, not further acknowledging their conflict.

Anck-su-namun shrugged her shoulders, put on no pajamas, got under the sheets, and cuddled up slightly to Evelyn; she lay on her back as Anck-su-namun lay on her side, a hand on Evelyn's left breast once again.

She fell asleep rather quickly, but Evelyn stayed awake for a while, angry and frustrated, her eyebrows knit together, lip pouting and quivering slightly…

MEANWHILE…

Imhotep lay under the bed sheets, clean and seething. Rick stepped in from the adjacent bathroom in his boxers, freshly bathed. Imhotep sat up in bed.

"Okay, if we're going to stay in the same room, let me make something clear. You WILL NOT touch me in a sexual way. You WILL NOT make advances on me. You WILL NOT kiss me. And, you should know, I, like many of my Ancient Egyptian brethren, sleep naked. It is comfortable. DO NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME JUST BECAUSE I AM NUDE. If you disobey, I will kill you. Do you understand?" Imhotep said sternly.

"Yes sir." Rick responded.

"Good."

Rick slipped into the bed next to Imhotep.

Imhotep turned, his back facing Rick.

Rick looked to Imhotep, and sighed.

"Listen… I heard about Anck-su-namun…. How she's a lesbian and all…..I'm really sorry you had to go through all that." He rubbed Imhotep's arm, trying to comfort him.

"Stop that." He snapped.

"Okay." Rick said, removing his hand. He lay down next to him, his back to his back, complying with his orders.

Imhotep stared out the room window at the full moon, gripping the pillow his head rested on, thinking of Anck-su-namun….

He let out a small cry, but quickly silenced it. His tears began to fall, hopefully unnoticed, but…..

"…Imhotep? …Are you alright?"

"I…I'm fine…"

"…No, you're crying. I can hear it in your voice…"

There was silence for a moment. Then, Rick turned and embraced Imhotep from behind.

"W-what are you doing? ….S-s-s-stop that…"

"For tonight, you're just going to have to forgive me." Rick responded.

Imhotep was going to protest, but… for some reason, he couldn't seem to bring himself to reject this comfort.

"I….I just don't understand….I can't understand it…."

"Shhh….shh, it's going to be alright. Everything's going to be fine, Imhotep…"

Imhotep could feel the man's hot breath on his neck, his warm chest pressed against his back, his arms wrapped around his waist, his beating heart….

He felt strangely comfortable, despite wanting to deny it… it was almost like….almost like he cared about him…..

SIMOULTANEOUSLY…

Alex was asleep, but not for long. Undead Priestess Shashaiti, in both boredom and a need to lighten the mood in the house, had sprayed whipped cream into Alex's hand, and flicked his nose with a feather. After a little while, Alex smacked at it and awoke to his face being covered in whipped cream. When he cursed Shashaiti's name, she simply laughed a little evil laugh, in sheer utter immature amusement.


	3. Streak

**Chapter 3: Streak**

THE NEXT MORNING…

Imhotep looked left, then right, and then dashed across the hallway. He went to a hall mirror in a corner with a few antiques. He checked once again, to be sure he was alone. Indeed, he was…

He looked in the mirror, and revealed what he grasped tightly concealed in his fist… Evelyn's eyeliner pencil. Silently, he leaned in toward the mirror, and began to apply it. It was the small comforts of home like this that made situations like the one he was in a little better…

As he did so, he did not notice the sound of footsteps walking up behind him.

"Hmm…that actually looks stunning, you know." Rick said, causing Imhotep to jump and draw a black line down his cheek. He glared at Rick. "What do you want?" "Erm… nothing. …I didn't know you were into cross-dressing, but I like it." Rick said. Imhotep stammered, appalled at the statement, responding, "I am not cross-dressing! It was normal for men to wear make-up like women in my time!" "Really? …Well, now it's cross-dressing. Don't worry, it looks good on you! But… anyway, I came to talk about something else." Rick responded. "…What?" Imhotep asked.

"…Did you feel anything last night?"

"NO! I was just sad and I was in need of someone's comfort. I thank you for that. But it wasn't… special, if that's what you mean."

"…Really?"

"…Yeah."

Admittedly, Imhotep had a slight twinge of guilt run through him when he saw the pain that Rick tried unsuccessfully to hide on his face, but he shook it off.

"…Here, let me get that for you." Rick said, licking his finger and rubbing it against the black streak Imhotep had yet to remove from his cheek.

Imhotep flinched. "Wha-what-GET OFF! I can do it myself!" He said, pushing Rick's hand away, turning to the mirror, and rubbing the line off himself.

Rick watched him, smiling. "You know, you're kinda cute when you're angry." He said.

Imhotep turned to him slowly, glaring. He walked towards him with enraged strides. "YOU… CALL… THIS… CUTE?" He back-hand-bitch-slapped Rick so hard that he slightly flew off the ground, hit the wall, and then collapsed to the floor. Imhotep then stormed off in a rather huffy mood, searching for another mirror that no one else was near. Rick, laying on the ground, muttered to himself, "Oh geez...owww ouuuch... ugh... why do I always say the wrong thing at the wrong time?"

MEANWHILE...

Evelyn woke up groaning to being shaken on the shoulder by Anck-su-namun. "Wake up, sleepyhead! Come on, wake up!... Okay, seriously, wake up E-V, this is getting ridiculous." She opened her eyes to see Anck-su-namun, still naked, serving her breakfast in bed. "Oh! Oh... thank you." Evelyn said, sitting up to accept the tray. Her breakfast apparently consisted of orange juice, toast, bacon, scrambled eggs, and grits. After she handed the tray to Evelyn, Anck-su-namun walked to the radio, turned it on to an entertaining station, and grabbed her breakfast. She sat beside Evelyn, who had begun to feast. "Anck-su-namun, this is delicious! Where did you learn to cook like this?" She smiled. "You know, before I went after Imhotep, I was a single English woman. I had to learn to cook; I barely ate when I wasn't good at it!" She laughed at the memories. "Well, it's divine, I swear to you, just divine!" Evelyn declared. "Well, thank you, ma'am!" Anck-su-namun said.

Later, they had finished their meal and turned off the radio. Evelyn had put on a yellow dress. Anck-su-namun, on the other hand, did not...

"Once again, thanks for breakfast." She said, approaching the door out of the room.

"Are you going to seduce Ardeth?" Anck-su-namun asked, laying on the bed.

Evelyn stopped. "...Why?"

"You are, aren't you?"

"Ummm...maybe... I'll see you later, then." She said, leaving the room, thinking Anck-su-namun wouldn't follow in her nude state.

She was wrong.

"So, you think getting rid of me is that easy?"

"Wha-uhh- why are you in the hall na-"

"I'm not giving up that easy."

Alex suddenly entered the hallway, and stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening as though he were a deer in headlights.

"Evelyn, for now I'll let you have your fun trying to catch him, but when you change your mind, I'll still be here." she walked back to the door.

"What? What are you talking about?" Evelyn asked.

Anck-su-namun turned around, her hand on the doorknob, and belted out a verse–

"IN JUST SEVEN DAYS... I CAN MAKE YOU A LESBIAN!"

She then went back into the room and shut the door.

There was an awkward silence between mother and son in the hallway.

"Umm... mom, I'm not objecting to the fact that there are naked women in the hallway, I don't mind that, but... why is she saying that she's going to make you a lesbian?"

"I-it's nothing, Alex." Evelyn responded, walking down the hall and away.

She walked through the house, looking for Ardeth, to no avail. But she did find Imhotep,

sitting on the kitchen floor, staring at the ceiling, the back of his head against the counter.

She sat down beside him and joined in the staring. He glanced at her, then looked up again. "...Hi." he said. "...Hey." she responded.

"So... what's new?"

"Not much, I guess. ...Other than your girlfriend-

"Ex-girlfriend."

"...Ex-girlfriend... is trying to seduce me. ...She's a really good cook, you know."

"...Yeah."

"...Are you... are you wearing my eyeliner?"

"...Yes..."

"Eh, well... keep the stick. I know how you Ancient Egyptians like eyeliner. Besides, I have a lot more where that came from."

"Thanks! ...You know, it's funny, your husband-"

"Ex husband."

"...Ex-husband... caught me putting it on, and now he thinks I'm into cross-dressing. We all wore it when I was young, I swear!"

Evelyn laughed. "Yeah, there were some things on ancient culture that I could never get to make sense to him."

"You know, your husband-"

"Ex."

"Ex-husband is really trying to be kind, I know but... he's kind of scaring me, I mean, he killed me, how can he love me?"

"Yes, I understand that completely! It's the same way with your girlfriend!"

"Ex-girlfriend."

"Right."

"So... no hard feelings?"

"On what?"

"That I... tried to kill you?"

"Oh, no, if you have none that I made you mortal."

"No, it only lasted a couple minutes anyway."

"...You know, you and me have a lot more in common than I thought!"

"I know! I don't know why your husba- EX-husband thinks he can make me gay, and my ex-girlfriend thinks she can make you a lesbian, especially when I still love her even though she's lesbian and you apparently have a thing for Ardeth even though he's gay!"

"Exactly! We're straight, right?"

"Right!"

A short silence, then Evelyn spoke again-

"... Actually... I was always a bit... bi-curious, but... I don't think anything will come of this thing she's starting."

"...Well, yeah... me too..."

"...You know, I think we could be really good friends."

"You're right, we get along really well!"

And they went on chatting about many things, mostly their current relationship problems.

They had no idea that the whole time, Ardeth and Jonathan were eavesdropping on them. After a while, though, they left, and walked down the hall.

"Johnny... Johnny, what am I supposed to do about your sister? Your sister likes me, and I love you... how am I going to get through this?" He was practically dizzy with the stress.

"I dunno, lovey, I couldn't tell you what to do about that. You'll have to get her to realize that it won't happen, you and her, but I know that it's my sister, and she's sensitive... Stop! Stop, wait!"

"What, what is it?"

"Shhhh!"

They stopped in the hallway, and overheard... Rick and Anck-su-namun talking.

"Oh no, not again!" Ardeth muttered to himself.

What they didn't know is that inside the room, Anck-su-namun had put on a rather revealing silk robe and was sipping coffee, and Rick had an ice pack on his slapped face.

"Really, I've gotta thank you for the ice."

"No problem, man! You've said it like, ten times now!"

"Ah, my God... I just can't believe he actually slapped me! And after saying that last night was nothing! What the hell, pardon my French!"

"Ah, fuck being proper, I hear it all the time. I know what you mean."

"Jeez...ah... I know I made the mistake of killing him, but can't he understand that I was being stupid, and I'm different now! I mean, GOD, I LOVE HIM!"

"I know! It's the same with Evelyn! We're in the same boat! We have a lot in common, I can't see why we hated each other so much before!"

"Ah...hey...can I ask you something? ...How would I, I mean... what does Imhotep like? In a partner, I mean?"

"Well, he uhh... he likes being masculine, but he's also kind of feminine, you know? He had a hard life, he really just wants some tenderness. He liked to sleep with his head on my chest and his arms around my waist. He needs to know how much you love him. He likes romantic gestures, little or big. In sex, he likes to be touched; close body contact is good. He can do rough or gentile, he's up for anything as long as you're both naked and he's not tied up. Oh, and the eyeliner was normal back then, don't tease him about his make-up."

"Yeah, I found that out the hard way..."

"...Can you give me some advice on Evelyn?"

"...Eh, well...as far as I know, you're doing everything right. There's not much to really say... except you're taking the wrong approach on the Ardeth thing. Telling her it won't happen doesn't work. ...Ever. Just... never say that. You're going to have to be patient to win her over."

Ardeth's head met his hand and a silent shaky exhale escaped his lips. Jonathan put a hand on his shoulder, trying to help him keep calm.

"Yeah... well, here's to hoping we get the lovers in the end!" They laughed.

Slowly, Ardeth stood up, trying to recover from the strain, Jonathan helping him.

"Oh, Johnny... I need you now... take my mind away from here..."

Five minutes later, both men were naked in their room.

Jonathan was sucking feverishly on Ardeth's manhood, to no avail.

"Oh!...Oh...oh my God, I can't believe this is happening!"

Jonathan detached himself from his boyfriend.

"...Ardeth... you lost erection..."

"...I know, I'm sorry...it's not you, it's me... I can't... I can't keep my mind on us..."

"Well, what are you thinking about, love?"

"...It's...It's..."

"Come out with it!"

And then, Ardeth began to sing-

"The love of Evelyn is hangin' over my head, _gasp_! And I've got the feelin' she'll be laying naked in my bed! OH, woe was me, her love is my misery, OOOOOOOH, CAN'T SHE SEE THAT HER BROTHER (USUALLY) GIVES ME A BONER?"

Suddenly, thanks to Shashaiti discreetly secretly unlocking the door, Rick, Anck-su-namun, and of course Evelyn barged into their room to join in the song. The two men jumped under the bed sheets in embarrassment in them catching them naked and putting a premature end to a sex act.

They sang a back-up sort of tune: "Shalalalalala ah it ain't no crime! Shalalalalala ah it ain't no crime! Shalalalalala ah it ain't no… CRIME! SHALALA!"

And so, there they were, the men under the bed sheets, the women standing on either side of the bed with one arm out to the side not next to the bed, and Rick on his knees with jazz hands in the air in front of the bed. Posed like a bunch of nuts.

And Undead Priestess Shashaiti saw it, and said it was good.


	4. Revelations

**Chapter 4- Revelations**

THE NEXT AFTERNOON, AROUND SUNSET...

Ardeth sat nervously in a chair in the hall, sipping his wine, hand shaking. He was waiting...

Evelyn said she had a surprise for him.

Her room door opened, and she stepped out...

She wore a revealing black bra, black thong, black thigh highs, black garters, black high heeled boots, and black silk gloves with black mascara, black eyeliner, and bright red lipstick. It was her sexiest outfit.

She walked to him slowly with catlike steps, with a look as though she were hungering for his body.

"Umm, Evelyn–"

"Hush, babe." She said, putting a red-painted fingernail to his lips, sliding slowly onto his lap.

She smiled devilishly. "You still think you're gay?"

"I don't THINK I'm gay, I AM gay, Evelyn! That's what I've been trying to say all this time, listen... I love your brother. I mean... I REALLY love your brother. It's not that you're unattractive; you're beautiful, but... I just don't love you, and... I'm just not much into women, you know?... We can still be friends, but... I am your brother's boyfriend. And I plan to be for the rest of my life, unless he becomes my husband. Do you understand? I really do care about you, Evelyn, but... not like that."

Evelyn's sex crazed look faded into a look of emptiness. "...Oh...I see..."

Many people said it was hopeless, but it still seemed possible. But now, he was the one saying it... it somehow just hit her.

She got up slowly, and walked back into her room.

She walked past the bed where Anck-su-namun lay, reading a book.

"Evelyn, you're back! How did it go? And why didn't you want me to look up?–OH, wow!" She looked up, as Evelyn had instructed her not to earlier. And she really liked what she saw, other than how sad she looked.

"He's...not...interested."

"Well, babe, I could've told you that."

"...I know."

She walked towards the bathroom. "Let me get this stuff off."

"Wait..." Anck-su-namun said, approaching Evelyn. "I know that he doesn't love you. But remember that I do."

She closed the bathroom door. ...And then, because she had said it, it somehow just hit her.

Somewhere, Shashaiti started to read the definition of emotion out of a dictionary.

Evelyn stepped out of the bathroom, back into the bedroom, looking at Anck-su-namun, once again seated on the bed, who wore a short, violet, low v-neck dress. She looked at Evelyn again.

And then...Evelyn began to sing.

"I was feeling downwind...couldn't win... I've never felt like this before...This is my first time getting...into female petting... so will it lead to trouble or... a wedding?"

Anck-su-namun had gotten to her feet, and was in front of Evelyn. She looked at her, up and down, stunned, and not sure if she should believe where it was going.

"So then I'll give it a go... see what flows–" She took of her bra. Anck-su-namun's eyes widened. "I'll taste the love, just give me more!" "More, more, more!" Anck-su-namun cooed, getting on her knees in front of her. Evelyn continued her song. "I'll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance." Anck-su-namun yanked down and removed Evelyn's panties suddenly, causing both women to gasp. Anck-su-namun began to stand again as Evelyn sang, "Do what you'll do to me," Anck-su-namun ripped off her dress, which she had worn nothing under, therefore leaving her nude. "Give me the passion!" Anck-su-namun put her hands on Evelyn's breasts, and began to squeeze and massage them. "Toucha-toucha-toucha touch me! I wanna be dirty! Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me! Creature of the night!" Somewhere, Shashaiti kept the song tune going, as...

They both jumped backwards onto the bed (so they were laying on the bed), and embraced, their breasts pressed together, kissing with wet feverish passion. Anck-su-namun grabbed Evelyn's ass, and smacked it, making her gasp. She got on top of Evelyn, hands on her boobs, tongue in her mouth. She began to slide down, kissing her collarbone, searching her chest. She found her nipple, which she sucked on and bit lightly, causing Evelyn to gasp and laugh lightly. Anck-su-namun reached down Evelyn's body, finding the intimate place she was looking for. She detached from her breast and looked at Evelyn sexily, sitting back as Evelyn spread her legs. She reached her fingers slightly into her wetness, meeting her clitoris. She began to stroke it, rubbing it side to side with her index finger, slowly at first... then she picked up the pace a bit. Evelyn exhaled, pleasure apparently building. Starting a normal, scold-like finger waving pace, she began to make short, quiet moaning noises; but soon Anck-su-namun was at a relatively fast pace, making Evelyn moan. She was approaching an orgasm, but she knew she needed her to go a little faster to get there. Evelyn hoped she would catch on, but Anck-su-namun was going to make her beg for it.

"Anck-su-namun... p-please...go faster..."

"As you wish..."

Evelyn moaned loudly, gasping, as the orgasm came. She could barely see straight– it seemed as though people she knew were finishing the song she sang earlier...

She saw Anck-su-namun sing "Creature of the night!"

...Which appeared to be followed by her ex-husband Rick, questioning in song, "Creature of the night?"

And then her former hopeless crush Ardeth, "Creature of the night..."

Followed by her newfound friend, Imhotep, half-sexy but half-jokingly, "Creature... of the night!"

For some reason then...her brother Jonathan belted out, "CREATURE OF THE NIIIIIGHT!"

Anck-su-namun returned, "Creature of the night!"

And Evelyn sing-yelled, "Creature of the night!" Followed by a gasp. The song and the orgasm ended.

Part of the bed was soaked in her orgasmic fluid. "Oh my GYOHD!...There's nothing quite like jumping back!" Evelyn exhaled.

"...I'm a jump-back?"

"Well...yes, you were at first, but, babe... I think I love you!"

Anck-su-namun smirked, and kissed Evelyn passionately. Evelyn kissed Anck-su-namun while also lightly pushing her back-words, and continued doing so until she lay on her back. Evelyn then kissed her neck, trailing downwards, kissing her breast, abdomen, and still going down, until...

Anck-su-namun gasped.

Evelyn was returning the favor by doing to Anck-su-namun what she did to her... only using her tongue.

THAT NIGHT...

Imhotep entered his room slowly, knowing Rick was in there, hoping he was asleep. Of course, he was not. He got out of bed, wearing loose pajama pants but no shirt. "Hi Imhotep." He walked to him, and rested a hand on his cheek, staring into his eyes. Imhotep appeared as he felt– increasingly confused. Rick, on the other hand, had a smile creep up. He then embraced Imhotep, letting his warmth spread over him. Imhotep was speechless. Then Rick whispered something in his ear... "I love you."

Imhotep pushed him away, hard. "Don't say that."

"Why shouldn't I?" Rick asked.

"You don't mean it."

"What makes you say that?"

Imhotep stared at Rick for a moment. Then, he just shook his head and walked away. He sat on the bed and threw his black robe off his shoulders. "Turn around; I'm going to bed." he ordered. Rick climbed in behind him, and put his arms around him again, his chest rubbing against the Egyptian man's back.

"It's okay... just... try to understand..."

"Get off of me."

"But-"

"GET OFF OF ME!"

He stood up, getting out of his grip. Rick stood too. "I don't understand."

"What's to understand? I don't love you."

Rick groaned. "Oh, Right. Right. Then who DO you love?"

Imhotep stared at him for a moment. Then he answered, "...Anck-su-namun."

"Imhotep, she's a lesbian! She loves my ex-wife! In fact, I think they're officially a couple now, they just had lesbian sex!"

The words hit Imhotep like a knife. He inhaled sharply, and closed his eyes. He was silent for a few short moments, but these moments seemed like forever. "...Imhotep?"

He finally opened his eyes, and spoke with a shaky voice, "...Do you have any idea... how much I hate you?"

Rick took the words like gunfire, and shot back, "If you hate me so much, why haven't you killed me?"

Imhotep looked at Rick; inhale, exhale, repeat. "...It's pathetic...I want to see...if there's a chance I that _am_ truly loved...even if it is by... the man who killed me..."

The room was so quiet that they could hear every breath they took.

And then, the most shocking thing in the world to Rick happened.

Once again, Imhotep began to weep.

He was quiet, his breathing rapid. "I can't believe this..." he wiped his eyes, continuing, "...What would my parents say to me?... They wouldn't be like this for their killer..."

"Your parents were murdered?"

"Yes, when I was 3... it was random street violence... they died for the money they carried... I was taken in by the high priest... he only adopted me to be heir, he hated me... Anck-su-namun...was my only love...I killed for her, became...THIS...I became what I hate most...I murdered so many people...I did horrible things...and went through horrible experiences...all of it... for her love...and all this time... it was a lie..." He put his hand on his mouth to quiet the gasp. "And now... a man who killed me... thinks he loves me? No...I-impossible...Impossible!" His back was against the wall, but he collapsed onto the ground, one hand over his mouth, the other gripping the carpet like he intended to rip it out. He was crying, hard.

"NO ONE CAN LOVE ME! ...I'M...A...MONSTER!..."

Rick got down on his knees and grabbed Imhotep by the shoulders , making him stare him in the face.

"You're wrong. I love you. Back then, it wasn't the same, and I wanted to protect my ex-wife. But now, I wish that the past could have been different. I wish I didn't kill you, and I'm sorry, because then, you would believe me when I say to you how much I want to be with you forever. I really, desperately want you. I need you. And I don't believe that you're a monster. I can forgive and forget that you killed people if you can forgive and forget that I killed you. I want to help you to be at peace. I know that you're really just a man who wants to be loved, and hasn't gotten it. But you have no idea how much I want to give my love to you! Please, let me do this, because I know that you need something better than what you've had. Imhotep, I love you!"

Imhotep looked at Rick, unable to say anything. The tears kept silently falling, but his look of almost animalistic sorrow faded, and slowly, a smile came to him.

"...Truly?"

"Of course!"

Slowly, Imhotep stood up, and sat back down on the bed. Rick looked confused for a moment, but then he got up and went to the bed, too.

Imhotep looked at Rick in a way that he had never seen him stare at someone before. It wasn't angry or sad, in fact, quite the contrary, it was... blissful. He wrapped his arms around the adventurer, who did the same in return. The embrace was close; their pulses met. Imhotep took in the rugged scent of the other man's neck, feeling his skin, hearing his breathing.

He whispered in his ear, "I love you too, Rick."

The man smiled. He bit the Egyptian's ear, making him quiver; then he slid his tongue into his ear, causing a gasp followed by moaning to escape Imhotep's lips. He moved his mouth down, leaving a trail of kisses down his neck. He found the place where the neck and shoulder met, and sucked it in.

"Ah...You're marking me?...I'm yours then...I belong to you..." Imhotep breathed out.

Rick detached his mouth, and the men stared into each other's eyes. They closed their eyes and leaned in for their lips to meet.

It was a soft, sweet, light kiss. Their lips parted for a few moments... Their next kiss was passionate, and wet; the third was harder and feverish. A few more had their tongues wrestling in each other's mouths, gripping each other as though their lives depended on it, moaning and gasping to get a breath between kisses.

Amidst this kissing, Imhotep suddenly shoved a hand down Rick's pants, grabbing his balls. He gasped between kisses as Imhotep fondled them, causing his erection to grow. Imhotep took hold of it, and began to stroke it. Rick started to moan in-between the kisses, opening his eyes and noticing the smirk Imhotep had at the sight of him in absolute pleasure because of his touch.

Apparently, it was a bit much Rick to process so quickly– that, or he didn't get enough breath between kissing and moaning. Quite suddenly, Rick passed out, falling sideways on the bed, his head falling on a pillow.

This immediately caused a bit of an awkward silence from Imhotep, followed by an effort to wake him.

He got on top of Rick, shaking his shoulder a bit. "Rick?...Rick, are you okay?...Rick. ...Rick!... RICK!"

He snapped awake suddenly, and looked at Imhotep. He was quite confused for a moment, but then he smiled.

"What? What's so funny? You passed out!"

"You care about me...and you're eager to please."

Imhotep looked surprised for a moment, and then smiled too, before he kissed Rick once again.

"Ah...Imhotep, I really do want to have sex with you, but... I just passed out. I don't want to pass out again, especially if it's during love-making."

"Yeah, I don't want you to pass out either, so...later, then?"

"Yeah, I guess so..."

They kissed once more, tender yet wet. And then Imhotep reached down...

"You don't mind if I still sleep naked, do you?"

"Are you actually asking that question?" Rick responded with a raised eyebrow.

"...Right."

He removed his loincloth, and tossed it off of the bed.

"...My God, you're gorgeous!" Rick said at the sight of him in the moonlight.

He smirked. "Thanks... I would like to see you."

"Uhh... really? ...Okay..." He said, reaching for his pants (and the boxers underneath) and pulling them off. He did the same as Imhotep, tossing them off of the bed.

"Oh, wow... are you sure we can't do something tonight?"

"Imhotep, I don't want to pass out! In fact, right now I feel kind of dizzy..." The man of his dreams had just gone from hating him to loving him in five minutes, of course he's dizzy.

"Alright..." Imhotep said before getting away from over him and laying beside him.

For a moment they were quiet.

"...Rick?"

"Yeah?"

"...Do you mind if I kind of...umm...sleep on you?"

Rick remembered Anck-su-namun mentioning that. "Go ahead!"

Imhotep smiled. He laid his head on his chest, and put an arm around his waist.

Rick jokingly said, "...It's funny, you hated me five minutes ago, and now you can't resist me, and you're worried about if I'm okay with something. Why is that, huh?"

Imhotep laughed. "It's because five minutes ago you were this former enemy that may or may not actually be in love with me... and now, you're my first boyfriend!"

They both blushed. "...Well... you're my first man, too..."

He smirked and kissed Rick on the cheek. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

Rick exhaled and smiled, putting an arm around Imhotep.

Imhotep slowly let his hand slide down from Rick's waist, until it reached what he was looking for...

"Oh, man... I feel lightheaded..." Rick remarked.

"There seems to be a connection between your balls and your habit of passing out."

Imhotep squeezed a little tighter on Rick's testicles.

"If you fall asleep that way, my uhh... well, my... you know, it's going to be in your hand when you wake up."

"So? Mine will be against your thigh."

Rick thought for a moment, realizing this. The smile crept up slowly, but it was quite wide. He hugged Imhotep closer and exhaled.

"Goodnight, Imhotep."

"Goodnight, my love."

IN THE HALL...

Alex, unfortunately for his fragile homophobic mind, became aware of the night's events, thanks to Shashaiti informing him.

He grabbed a teacup and flung it at her. She ducked, and it broke against the wall as she jumped out the window and flew to the heavens to type up the event.

As she did, she vaguely heard Alex yell, "FUCK YOU! JUST FUCK YOU!"

Shashaiti thought it was all rather interesting, on the other hand, and liked observing all of this go on. Even if she, as author, was indeed the cause... MUAHAHAHAHA!


End file.
